Thursday, 2 January 2014

The truth about my 2014

I've been thinking of this list for the last few weeks and given it quite a lot of thought to what I want to achieve and change this year. I find it really bizarre in a way by what is essentially just another day is actually the start of a whole new year. For some reason I never particularly enjoy the Christmas period,  I think this is mostly down to the feeling that the Christmas period seems to increase any feelings weather good or bad and for me once the party hangover subsides, call me a Scrooge but there always seems to be more lows then highs. The whole Christmas and New Year time seems to be filled with unrealistic expectations of the perfect day or perfect party what never usually goes to plan. 

Over the past month I've been thinking a lot of about what I want to achieve and change in 2014. Since I started my new job last month It's brought huge changes, it's forced me to leave my comfort zone and leave some good friends behind but as much as that terrified me it's made me realise taking myself out of my comfort zone won't kill me. The past few weeks setting of to work each morning has felt daunting, don't get me wrong I'm enjoying my new role and I couldn't ask to work with nicer more welcoming people but setting of to work each day feels a little like facing the world alone. I know that sounds massively exaggerated and especially since I always appear a rather confident person but it's made me realise If I want to change anything I need to do more things for myself. 

I really feel the new year makes us all a little more confident and for me one of my main goals will be to not dwell on negative things and work on becoming more positive. I think this year I've realised not to rely on other people for happiness and one of my main goals to set myself will be to stay positive.

I know my worst personality trait is to sulk or go in a massive mood as soon as things don't go my own way. I remember a few years back when I was with a group of close friends and we were pointing out what we didn't like about each other (not sure why). However I always remember one good friend pointing out as soon as things don't go my own way my mood massively changes. I'm still shocked that people have picked up on this, yet I understood completely. This can be as simple as friends changing plans and we don't end up going where agreed on a night out or things generally not going my way and feeling disappointed. I know as I'm writing this I'm on the verge of starting an argument with a friend what beneath everything boils down to not getting my own way. I know the core reason behind all this is a sense of disappointment but my biggest aim this year is going to be simply to accept life isn't perfect and make the most of all situations. 

I feel this year potentially holds the biggest changes for me yet, but my main aim beneath it all simply represents me becoming a nicer and better person. Wow I'm actually making myself out to be a right cow aren't I. Trust me I'm really not but some small changes defiantly wouldn't go a miss. Finally if you read all that here is my new years resolutions for 2014:

Be more positive. I'm old enough to realise life isn't ever going to be perfect. It's genuinely our own thoughts and feelings that can make the minor set backs 100 times worse. From now on I want to generally try and become more positive and not to dwell or sulk when things don't go my own way.

Get fitter/healthier. Ok so this may be the stereotypical resolution but I want to focus more on myself and I genuinely believe exercise is overall good for well being. I think I've accepted I'm not a gym goer and I don't expect to achieve a perfect body. I remember last year aiming to run a freaking marathon what was unbelievably unrealistic, so this year I'm simply aiming to join a gym, go regularly and gain a better sense of well being. Any weight loss or a slightly more toned body will be a bonus. 

Get out of my overdraft. I've wasted a stupid amount of money in the past on silly bank charges etc all because I'm pretty bad when it comes to managing my money. I really need to start telling myself it's ok if I miss a few nights out at the end of the month if I can't afford it and buying 10 pairs a shoes a month is no good when I can't afford to go out. I'm aiming to have a few good months and get myself back on track for good. I earn good money for my age and I know getting back on track is a must if I want to plan holidays etc later in the year.

Plan more things to look forward to. I tend to do this anyway and looking back over 2013 there was a lot of nice moments. I feel it's necessary to have something to look forward to no matter how small so this year I want to generally make the most of it. I'm aiming to have a few city breaks abroad and generally make more time to spend with friends weather this is a meal out or going to gigs etc. 


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